"Allatsea", on the road with Britain's most popular marine warranty surveyor.

And onwards

I left work early and managed to get back to Margit by 1615. That allowed me to help memsahib allatsea and others to assist with Drunky Nunky's move. We didn't get back home until nine in the evening, there was a lot to do.

Anyway, he's in there now and didn't seem too traumatised. He'll have his own space and it's a nice house. We filled the food lockers following an evening trip to Tesco, made sure that the heating and hot water worked, checked the cooker, fridge, toaster, microwave, phone(s), telly (licence sorted) and let his friends know his contact details. Carolyn will visit every evening on her way home from work. We'll do a weekly shopping run (no Voddy) and I'll visit him at the weekends when I'm home. All that said, yesterday was a very emotional day for all parties. Very upsetting. I hope to goodness that it works out for us all. If not, I'l go to my grave a haunted man.

In a few hours I'll start travelling to Antwerp. It's straight forward enough. Train from Margit to Viccy, taxi across town to LCY (£35 -£40, ouch) then a VLM flight to the centre of Antwerp. Check in the Holiday Inn and then out to the ship at around 0500 tomorrow morning. With luck we'll get done before midnight and then back to Margit on Saturday morning. It's madam allatsea's 50th berffday bash that evening so best be there.

Right then............ onwards.

FOUB day

Well the day's here. At last.

How do we feel?

Euphoric? Er....no.

Happy? Mmmmm..no

Relieved? Nope.

What then? Sort of sad, ashamed, unsure, worried, all of those to some degree.

Last night when I got in from work, he was, as usual, drunk. he was also, in his own disorganised way, trying to be helpful by having a 'rubbish van man' at the house to take away a lot of his detrius and similar. This had resulted in a fair amount of domestic chaos and confusion. I was not dignified or grown up about it and I shouted at him, I was dis-proportionately angry and  vehment. And then, and really only then, did I see him as a very vunerable , frail, sad, little, maddeningly infuriating but old, so very old for his years, dismal fuckup of an old man. But he's my uncle old man and I made him cry and I'm making him move out and I feel like the biggest arsehole in the world and I'm so very VERY ashamed.

So that's it then.....

On minute it was all irritation and impatience and the next we were in the new place and suddenly it all seemed so much of an anti climax. From quaint 100 year old character home to large money drain in the blink of an eye. Oh well, it'll give us something to worry about and focus on, I suppose. Oddly, Drunky Nunky seems to like the place and for several cleared eyed minutes positively enthused with plans for his new home. Time will tell on with that. To be honest I think his main concern is the newly increased walk from abode to Vodka supply, in which case he'll have to buy a bike.

The Antwerp job has been delayed until Thursday. What was to be a 5 day attendance has shrunk to day and a half but they'll be full days (and a half). The place must be popular all of a sudden because nearly all the direct flights there are sold out. At £480 return for a 50 minute flight they must be VERY profitable for VLM. Eye wateringly expensive flights aside, old allatsea was much in demand today because they also wanted him to go to Burntisland for a BP/ASCO loadout (knickerknotters they well be there but it's a straight forward enough job and the digs in Kirkcaldy are nice) and Thanet Wind has started to ramp up too with unexpected conference calls to the centre of the universe (Denmark???) being the order of the day.

Goodness, when will this excitement stop?

On the home front madam allatsea is much improved thankfully and was back at work this week. Not that I was pressuring her in that respect, far from it, just amazed that she was was so keen to go back.

Bless.

 

Tribulations on housemove day

So near and yet tantalisingly out of reach. Coo, I'm no good at this housemove milarkey. Was rung by our legal peeps at 1030 this morning to say the gaff was now ours. Good. Drive to said drum, old owner still there and muttering about her new place not completed yet but expecting a call soonest. Come home again and wait. Then dawns on me that as we've completed, the predicament of the current occupier isn't rteally our concern, the place is ours, so be off with her.

That however is easier said than done becuse she's a delighful old lady (a tadge dotty perhaps) and I don't want to appear all horrid and heavy (despite the fact that I am those things).

Oooh, as I write the phone's rung and I can go and collect the keys it seems. Hooray.

Not long now

Dum de dum de dee. Can anything be more tedious than a COSHH reporting procedure? What’s more, one that’s 59 pages long? Ugh oh ugh and groan. There’s got to be more to life than this, surely?

Well yes there is!! Weekly progress reports!! Hooray. So be it, there’s got to be lots of folks who’d be glad of the work so best I shut up and get on with it. Besides I have got some interesting stuff to do soon,amongst which is sorting out a present for madam allatsea’s 50^th.

 

I don’t think a £20 gift voucher from Debenhams and an evening at Margate’s finest ‘all you can eat for a tenner’ would go down very well, literally or figuratively speaking. She’s still completely walloped with the piggy thing and food will the last thing on her mind.

As far as FOUB day is concerned, and I hope I don’t ruin it by speaking prematurely, things are going along quite nicely. BT phone line sorted, Council Tax people informed, removals man coming this afternoon to assess the move, lecky and gas peeps informed and ready for a change of punter, water brigade in the picture and drunky nunky finally coming to the realization that it’s for real. At 71 he is effectively leaving home for the first time in his life. Up until now he’s either lived with his mum or me. Crikey.

Here in Lundun Tarn the heavens have opened and very welcome it is too. With luck it’ll wash the cricket out, a chap can only take so much humiliation after all.

Retail sales and daily rates

Another fine day here in the City. In between MOG pipeline docs and and semi laughable procedures from a well known subsea installer I had time to peruse the business headlines on t'internet. Considering the generally all pervasive economic gloom the news seemed positive, June and July's retail sales figures were higher than forecast and that, it seems, is very good news. 'Good oh' cry I.

The above though was very much at odds with a tender we sent out yesterday, in that the rates our honchos were seeking to impress with were more in line with what was being quoted when I joined the world of warranty 5 years ago (to the week by coincidence). Now that's not good news if you're one of those that lives in anticipation of a bonus cheque. Time to shorten that belt methinks.

The Antwerp trip is still on for next monday with the ship and the loadout quay being nominated and the agents poised for action. All being well it could be done and dusted in 5 days.

Mrs allatsea is still in a bit of a woeful state thanks to the dreaded piggy flu thing. In 24 years I've never seen her looking so battered. Poor old cherub. Oh well, at least the Battenburg cake's safe now and there'll be chance for the rest of us to have a go at it. 

Cats and pipelines

When is a MOG not a domestic cat of indeterminate heritage? When it's an oil company, in this case Maersk Oil and Gas, MOG for short.

In front of me is a small yet strangely threatening pile of MOG pipeline renewal documents. A man can only take so much of this kind of very dry reviewing and I've reached my limit for the day. Yesterday I mentioned that there was no sign of any travel and today Lisa has come to the rescue by sending me to Antwerp for 5 days next week. Seven very expensive Gas turbine generators and compressors to loadout and send on their way to Khazakstan. I'm the man for that. Get your certificates ready gentlemen, I'm on the way.

The Antwerp trip will cause a bit of teeth gritting on the home front though. Mrs Allatsea, currently bed-bound with the dreaded swine flu and looking like death this morning when I left the house with a cheery 'Don't forget the ironing', is 50 next monday and has been organising her own 'surprise party' for the following saturday, for months. Although my presence at said party won't mean the end of life as we know it I do rather fancy that she expects me to be there. Oh well, it was a 'surprise ' party after all.

I'll also miss the much anticipated and longed for FOUB day, currently scheduled for August 24th too. I'll let you guess what the letters stand for, but as a hint, Uncle, Off, Brian and F#*k are likely to feature prominently.

Bro has been on the jellybone and said his trip back to Oz went like a dream and he feels that he's had a really restful holiday. That's good news indeed but just for the record, the holiday knackered me. :o)

 

Sigh

A long blogging layoff, bro's visit seemed to use all the time there was. Nice.

After a 19 hour trip back darn sarf from Edinburgh (thank you for that BA, well done) it was straight into Bro's visit. He went back last night and the place seemed very empty without him. I even shed a tear or two, most unusual and definitely a bit woosy.

Drunky nunky exceeded all previous high standards of being a drunken =#*ehole by being out of his tree for just about every hour of the entire visit. Wonderful. Anyway come monday August 24th he will be in his own little cesspit, the days can't go quickly enough. Anyone wanting to help him on his way to eternal oblivion is hereby invited to send Vodka donations to 143 Millmead road, Margate CT9 3QT UK or alternatively ring him on +44 792 994 8459 and he can burble at you for as long as you can bear it. It's a wonderful experience, I know, I've had it for 54 years.

Reality of another sort this morning, starting with the 0629 to Cannon Street (noticeably emptier than normal, ooh er missus) and an appearance at the Tabernacle Street offices for the first time in a month. A bit of a shock to the system it has to be said but nothing that a large chicken doner kebab and half a bottle of gin can't put right. At the time of writing there doesn't appear to be any 'travel'  to be had so I'll have to eke out the days with the very modest amount of technical reviews there are in the 'in' tray. Although all the lads are out and doing fee earning work (those that aren't on leave), there's a real feeling of 'nowt to do' about the place. I don't like it at all.

On the expansion front, Nobby Dees now have a Moscow office. All those wanting to work there take one step forward ........... hang on, where's everybody run away to?